Anger and Regret

When someone dies people close to the person or family members often feel two emotions other than grief.  Anger and regret. 

I do not experience those emotions.  Even when my beloved Gerard died so abruptly I did not feel angry with God....at least not that I can recall.  I felt disappointed.  I still feel some disappointment.  I do not believe that he deserved to exit the stage just as his starring role was coming up.  When Lottie Bell (my grandad's sister) left me I felt so lost, but never angry.  She lived a full life.  I understood why God would want her in heaven.

With the death of both my beloveds, I never experienced feelings of regret.  I do not regret anything in my relationships with either.  Yes I was hard on Gerard.  Yes I always challenged him to dig deeper, to be better, but it was all out of love.  After I moved to Atlanta in 2008 anytime I spoke to Lottie Bell and she mentioned that she missed me it was time to come home.  I didn't want her missing me.  She gave me everything I ever needed in life, I had to give her what she needed.

It's so cliche to say "give people their flowers while they are alive".  How many of us do it though?  That is the reason for the feelings of anger and regret.  You didn't do what you should have while your loved one was alive.  Change that.  Quit being "too busy" for phone calls, text messages, and family gatherings.  Spend time with those who truly matter.  Time is priceless.  No matter how much you work, you will never be able to afford it.

#ForeverGerard